Sunday, August 14, 2011


I'm sitting here with absolutely no idea what to blog about today. Nothing terrific happened today, well, nothing anyone wants to read about happened. My mind is a complete blank. But I look to my right, and there,sitting on the cart right next to my little printer, is a book I picked up on my trip to Colorado earlier in the year: "Write a Novel (and get it published)". I picked it up because it has what looks like a great section on Structure, and that seems to be a weak spot in my writing.

But that's not important right now.

Seeing that "How To" book lying there gave me a thought. I'll bet there are a whole bunch of "How To" books that don't exist, but should! So I thought I'd try making a list of helpful "How To" books that, as far as I know, don't exist yet.

"How To" Books that Don't Exist
(but should)
  • "Mickey-Mousing  -  A Home Owner's Guide"

  • "No, Really, It's for a Friend!"
    • ... or "How to purchase an embarrassing ointment or other personal product"
  • "No, Really, It's A Horrible Cold."
    • ...or "A Guide to Avoiding Kissing, Shaking Hands, or Otherwise Touching the Strange Relatives you Only See at Weddings and Reunions."
  • "It's a Boy!"
    • ... or "Lawn Care - Long Term Solutions to Labor-Intensive Problems"
  • "No, Really, It's A Terrible Cold."
    • ...or "A Guide to Avoiding Kissing, Shaking Hands, or Otherwise Touching the Strange Dude Your So-Called 'Friends' Set You Up With."
  • "Yes, Officer, But I Can Explain... "
    • ...or, "How to get out of a ticket when you are so, SO in the wrong..."
  • "The Immune System of the Gods!"
    • ... or "How To Get Around A Hottie Who's Using The Old 'No, Really, It's A Terrible Cold' Defense"
  • "My Computer? It's In The Shop"
    • ... or "What to Tell The Dork Who's Urging You to Read His Blog"

Okay, I think that's enough punishment for you few readers tonight. I think I'll wrap this up. 
Just a warning: I may return to this topic at a later date. 

Now... I have to get up early and call my local computer shops. I feel I need to warn them that there's about to be a run of people who feel the need to get their computers "In The Shop".

Sorry about that.

Talk to to you later!

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