All or Nothing

Handsome needs a haircut. This evening, when I got to the house, Wife decided she was gong to try to get him out to get a trim.

"I don't want a haircut!" he said.

"You need one," said Wife. "You're getting one."

He looked to me for help.

"Dad! Can I just not get a haircut?"

I shave my head in the shower every night. He was getting no sympathy from me.

"Go. Get a haircut. I'll see you when you two get back."

"Aww!"

As they went out the door I heard him asking if he could say how much came off.

"How much are you going to say?" I heard his mother asking.

"Like... like, a centimeter off the top? No, wait, what's smaller, a centimeter or a millimeter?"

The door closed, and off they went. I started some coffee and took a shower. By the time I got out they were already back. They had been too late, and the place had been closing for the night when they got there.
There had been a new development, however.

"Go ahead, tell him," Wife said as they came in the room. "Tell your father what you want to do with your hair!"

Handsome smiled.

"You want to shave it all off and have it woven into a wig for your old man?" I suggested.

He looked horrified.

"No! I want to get just a little off the top, and then-"
He turned around to show me the back of his head, and ran a finger across the hair there in two crescents, one high, the other lower.
"- I want to have them shave in 'Merry' (the high crescent), 'X-mas' ( the lower crescent).

I stared at him.

"Are you serious?"

"Yeah," he said. "That would be cool!"

Wow. It's all or nothing with this kid!

Talk to you later!