Friday, February 1, 2013

Off the Cuff, or Utter Crap?

I spent a good part of this week (lunches, anyway) writing a lengthy post about some pretty stupid crap happening at work recently. I finished it this afternoon, went back to read it over, and said to myself Holy #%$#, this is utter crap!
Was I really going to give you six pages of me bitching? Really? Wow, what did you ever do to me?
Soooo... I scrapped that week's worth of work, and started from scratch a little while ago. 

You see? I love you all that much.

So instead of my well-crafted bitching you're getting two off-the-cuff Funny Handsome Moments and one stupid question to answer.  Please take part in the poll... everything I've read about having a good Blog says that audience participation is key.

So participate, dammit!

Okay... here we go...

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Funny Handsome Moments:
  • Sitting down to put on his shoes, he placed his sneakers on the table next to him. He spoke to me for about 30 seconds, then began to look about the room, a blank expression on his face. When I asked what he was looking for his blue eyes widened still further, and he proceeded to point wordlessly at his sock-clad feet. Not only had he lost the sneakers he'd put down right next to himself, he'd gone blank for the moment on what they were called.
  • I was making dinner, Handsome was helping. He added the milk and butter to the potato flakes and stirred them up, adding more flakes as needed until the mixture was judged to be the right consistency. While he was stirring, the corn came out of the microwave and was put in a bowl on the counter, and he had to step aside for a moment as I took the pork chops from the oven, resting the broiler on the stove top next to him.
    The potatoes being done, Handsome stuck the mixing fork in the pot and stepped around me as I was pulling plates from the cabinet, and went into his room. The door closed, and I heard the sounds of his PlayStation game commencing. I strode over, opened the door and planted myself right in front of his television.
    "You just made the potatoes, right?" I said, leaning down to make eye contact.
    "Right," he said.
    "And you were standing right there when I took out the pork chops and pulled the corn out of the microwave, right?"
    "And you saw me getting out the plates we're going to eat off of, right?"
    "Yeah. Right."
    "And after all that, are you telling me I actually have to come in here and tell you dinner's ready?"
    He stared at me for a moment, in wide-eyed thought, then offered a weak smile and, apparently, the correct answer.


    ~ ~ * * ~ ~

    And now for my stupid question: Are you an over or an under?

    What am I talking about? 

    Toilet paper.

    When you load up the roll, how do you load it? Over or under? I've actually had arguments with people about this, so I just thought I'd ask. 

    You out there! Yes, you! The WYMOP reader! Are you an over or an under?

    Please, help me answer this burning question by tossing a vote into the poll to the right. My 'Roll Poll', if you will. And if you think this is a stupid question, I'd just like to remind you of a certain saying we've all heard again and again:

    There are no stupid questions, only stupid people.

    That's it for this week. Do your thing, enjoy your life, and watch your ass while you're making other plans!

    Talk to you later!

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