The other night at Handsome’s Blue and Gold Cub Scout banquet, each scout den was required to put on a skit of some kind. Handsome’s skit went just fine, and I could tell you about it, but not today. Maybe tomorrow. Today I’m going to cheat like mad and tell you about another skit that went on that night.
One of the dens stood all their boys in a row, and they were going to tell us all Astronaut jokes. They each had their own sheet of the jokes, and they were passing the microphone down the line from kid to kid. The first kid in line read a joke:
“How do you get an astronaut baby to sleep?”
Then he read the answer: “Rocket.”
He passed the mic to the next kid in line, who read his joke: “What should an astronaut do when he gets dirty?”
Then he read the answer: “Rocket.”
A beat went by as he replayed what he’d just said in his mind, then pointed to a different part of the paper and cried out “No! Wait! ‘Take a meteor shower’!”
Then he burst out laughing. Well, we all laughed at that, and that pretty much set the tone for the rest of the skit. Every time one of the jokes was, well, not too funny, someone in the audience would call out “Rocket!” and everyone would laugh, including the Scouts up on stage!
Just for giggles, and to fill up some space on the page (I told you I was going to cheat liker mad!) I’m going to include the rest of their jokes below. If any of them don’t make you at least smile, just say “Rocket” out loud.
Works every time!
The Jokes:
What did the astronaut get when the rocket fell on his foot? Mistletoe
What did the astronaut think of the restaurant on the moon? He thought the food was fine but there wasn't much of an atmosphere
What did the astronaut see on the stove? An unidentified frying object
What is an astronaut's favorite key on a computer keyboard? The space bar
What do you call an astronaut's watch? A lunar-tick
Where do astronauts keep their sandwiches? In their launch boxes
Why don't astronauts relate well to other people? They are not always down-to-earth
Why do astronauts wear bullet-proof vests? To protect themselves against shooting stars
What happens to astronauts who misbehave? They’re grounded
Did you hear the one about the spaceship? It was out of this world
What do you call a space magician? A flying saucerer
What kind of Star Wars toy can you ride? A Toy-Yoda
When is the moon not hungry? When it is full
How did the rocket lose its job? It was fired
How does the astronaut describe his work? Heavenly
And that’s all he wrote.
Talk to you later!
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